Rules for Fighting Fair

As mentioned when I talked about my hate/hate relationship with conflict, one of the things we did recently in our marriage Bible study was to come up with some ground rules for fighting fair.

Here's a few that we came up with. If you have any more to share, I'd love to hear!

1. Take Turns. Each person gets a turn to explain their point of view, without interruptions.

2. Don't Get Historical. Keep the past in the past. If you have forgiven them for past mistakes, they need not to be rehashed every time you argue.

3. Don't Get Hysterical, Either. Stay calm. Yelling and screaming don't help you get your point across.

4. Try Not to Take it Personally. Remember that conflict is normal, and healthy. One of you doesn't have to be right, and one wrong--you can just have different opinions.

5. Be Picky. Ask yourself if what you're arguing about is really worth arguing about. If you're arguing just for the sake of being right, stop.


I struggle most with number four. What about you?